Lily Rules! (Paperback)

Chapter One

Lily Robbins looked around her and shook her head of wildly curly red hair. "Like anybody's listening to her," she said to her best friend, Reni Johnson, who was sitting next to her in the auditorium.

Reni pursed her lips, popping out her dimples. "She might as well be talking to a bunch of animals," she said.

"She is."

Lily pointed to the small group of seventh graders who had been arranging themselves into seats three rows down for the last ten minutes. Ashley Adamson was trying to place everybody boy-girl, amid much flipping of turned-up blonde hair and rolling of heavily shadowed blue eyes. Her cohort, Chelsea Gordon, was plucking at the boys' shirtsleeves and laughing up into their faces - practically drooling as far as Lily could tell.

"She's gotta be the worst flirt in the whole seventh grade," said Zooey Hoffman, who was sitting on the other side of Lily.

On the other side of Zooey, Suzy Wheeler shook her head, her shiny, straight black hair splashing against her cheeks. "Bernadette's worse."

Lily had to strain to hear Suzy, who was obviously trying to follow Ms. Ferringer's instructions even though none of the other students were.

"What Suzy say?"

That came from Kresha Ragina, who was sitting on the other side of Reni, squinting from behind her wispy, sand-colored bangs.

This has got to be hard for Kresha, Lily thought.

Kresha was from Croatia, and although her English was improving all the time, she still had trouble sorting out words when there was chaos.

"She said Bernadette is the biggest flirt in the seventh grade," Reni told her.

"What is 'flirt'?"

Lily let Reni explain it to Kresha while she studied Bernadette. She was definitely tossing her head of shoulder-length, curling-ironed hair at Benjamin. But she had some pretty stiff competition from Chelsea and Ashley and about five other girls who were all snatching ball caps from the heads of boys who, they obviously knew, would go to great lengths to get them back.

What is so fun about being around a bunch of absurd little creeps? Lily thought. Give me my Girlz anytime.

She looked down the row on either side of her at Suzy, Zooey, Reni, and Kresha - the Girlz Only Club - and gave a contented sigh. Just then the microphone squawked with feedback up on the stage, which sent everybody into a frenzy of moaning and ear covering. Ms. Ferringer took that opportunity to shout, "Quiet down now, guys, or we won't get any class officers elected today."

At that, Ashley half-rose in her seat and made a loud shushing noise. The auditorium got as quiet as it was probably going to get.

"She so thinks she runs this school," Zooey whispered to Lily, round eyes rolling.

Lily rolled hers back and then settled into the seat. This was going to be a long assembly, watching the popular kids get elected to office. It was going to give them still another reason to act like they owned Cedar Hills Middle School.

"We're three months into the school year," Ms. Ferringer said into the mike.

"Ya think?" somebody in Ashley's row shouted.

A bunch of kids laughed. Lily didn't.

"And now that you've all had a chance to get to know people who've come here from other elementary schools, you get to elect officers."

"She talks like one of the kids," Reni whispered to Lily. "No wonder she doesn't have any control."

Lily nodded. Even now in the row in front of them, Daniel and Leo were launching folded-up pieces of paper from rubber bands.

"Here's how this is going to work, guys," Ms. Ferringer was shouting, even though she was practically swallowing the microphone at this point. "Quiet down, now - I will take nominations for president first."

Hands went up in Ashley's row, and somebody yelled out "Benjamin!" The rest of them clapped like the voting had already happened.

"If you nominate someone," Ms. Ferringer went on, "you have to give a nominating speech - not longer than a minute - about why you think your candidate would make a good officer."

Bernadette waved her hand more wildly than ever. Ms. Ferringer pointed to her, and Bernadette bounced out of her seat and up the aisle toward the stage, hair swinging down her back in perfect curls.

"I want to nominate Benjamin!" Bernadette squealed into the mike. Ashley's row erupted.

Ms. Ferringer paused, dry-erase marker in her hand. "What is Benjamin's last name?" she asked.

Bernadette looked at her as if she'd lost her mind. "Hel-lo-o," she said. "Weeks!"

"Like everybody in the world knows him," Reni muttered to Lily.

While Ms. Ferringer wrote Benjamin's name on the white board, Bernadette dazzled the auditorium with a smile and said, "I nominate Benjamin because - he's so cute!" Then she squealed again and tossed her hair. "No - just kidding - I mean, he is cute - but that's not why he should be president. He should be president because - like - who else knows as many people as he does?"

Ashley's row cheered as if Bernadette had just delivered the Gettysburg Address, and Bernadette bounced back to her seat.

"Any other nominations?" Ms. Ferringer said.

To Lily's surprise, Ashley raised her hand.

"Who's she gonna nominate?" Reni whispered to Lily. "I thought her whole crowd would be voting for Benjamin."

"Come on up," Ms. Ferringer said to Ashley. Although the auditorium was still one big squirming mass, she looked pleased, as if things were going rather well. Lily looked at the clock. They still had fifty endless minutes to go.

When Ashley got to the microphone, she took a few seconds to connect with her group, who all whistled and cheered before she even said anything. Then she leaned into the mike, gave a somewhat evil smile, and said, "I nominate Lily Robbins."

Lily immediately knew she was starting to blotch up like she always did when she wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Ashley would do anything to humiliate Lily.

"I think Lily Robbins should be president," Ashley was saying, still with that sarcastic smile on her face, "because she's, like, way responsible, and she's totally serious about everything." She paused, as if she were expecting boos. There were a few exaggerated snores and one shout of, "Oh - so she's a geek!" But it apparently wasn't enough for Ashley, because she added, "And she's teacher's pet in, like, every class."

That did it. The auditorium exploded with put-down laughter and cut-down comments. Lily felt like she was being sliced and diced for a trip to the frying pan.

"So if you like that kind of a person," Ashley shrieked over the commotion, "vote for Lily Snobbins - oh, sorry - Robbins."

"I'm gonna throw up," Lily said to Reni.

"Are you really?" Zooey said. "Do you want me to go to the restroom with you?"

"No!" Reni said. "You have to stay here and vote!"

"Like it's gonna matter," Lily said as she watched Ashley wiggle triumphantly back to her seat. "Nobody's gonna vote for me after that speech."

"Will the two candidates please hide your eyes?" Ms. Ferringer said from the stage. "We will vote by raising hands. Teachers - are you ready to count?"

Several of the teachers and administrators stood up, including Officer Horn, the school's policewoman, who was known among the students as Deputy Dog. Right now she was living up to her nickname as she came down the aisle and stood like a rottweiler at the end of Ashley's row.

"She's gonna make sure nobody raises more than one hand," Reni said. "Cover your eyes, Lily."

Lily did, gladly. There was no way she wanted to see how badly she was about to be defeated.

"All those for Benjamin raise your hands, please," Ms. Ferringer said.

Lily could feel arms waving in front of her and behind her. She could also hear Ashley's friends giving a victory whoop.

"All those for Lily -"

There was a lot of rustling around - more than Lily expected - and beside her, she heard Reni gasp.

"Lily!" she whispered. "I think you just won!"

Lily shook her head. "No way!" she whispered back.

There was a long, unbearable pause, and then Ms. Ferringer cried out, "Lily Robbins is our seventh-grade class president!"

She sounded as amazed as Lily felt. Lily pulled her hands away from her eyes and looked around, stunned. The first person she saw was Ashley, popping up out of her seat.

"That's not right!" she shouted. "We demand a -" She turned abruptly to her friends. "What's that thing called?" she said.

"A recount!" Benjamin called out.

Ms. Ferringer hesitated, as if she were considering it. Down in the front, Mrs. Reinhold - the English teacher - was shaking her head firmly. Ms. Ferringer glanced down at her and shook her head at Ashley.

"She's as scared of Mrs. Reinhold as we are!" Suzy said.

At least, that was what Lily thought Suzy said. She was still so flabbergasted, she wasn't sure of anything she was hearing.

But Ms. Ferringer erased Benjamin's name from the board and opened the nominations for vice president. Bernadette was, of course, on her feet at once, but Lily missed most of what went on for the next few minutes.

I'm president! was all she could think. I'm president of the whole seventh-grade class!

Visions of standing before them all, gavel in hand, filled Lily's head. She'd have to rethink her wardrobe, of course. You couldn't conduct class meetings in jeans. She'd definitely have to tame her hair - and probably get a more conservative binder since hers had Winnie the Pooh on the front. Then there were going to be bills and amendments to introduce and all that stuff that she wasn't quite sure about yet, but if she got some books to read about government and maybe interviewed the mayor -

She was imagining herself putting some important-looking document on the principal's desk when Reni nudged her and said, "Raise your hand!"

"Why?" Lily said, as Reni grabbed her wrist and jerked her arm into the air.

"You're voting for Ian Collins!"

"Who's Ian Collins?"

"I don't know - but he's not Benjamin!"

Lily looked with glazed eyes at the dry-erase board. The names Ian Collins and Benjamin Weeks had been written there, and votes were obviously being taken. It looked as if Benjamin's name was about to be erased again.

"Ian Collins is our winner!" Ms. Ferringer said - although she looked once more at Mrs. Reinhold for the final nod. Ashley's group stood up and chanted, "Recount!"

Lily ignored them and checked out Ian Collins, who was sitting across the aisle, being congratulated by his friends.

Oh, yeah, Lily thought. I know him. He was in a couple of her classes, but she'd never noticed him much, probably because he wasn't obnoxious. Most of her attention to boys had been attracted by the stupid things they always seemed to be doing.

Lily looked curiously at Ian. He was taller than a lot of the boys in seventh grade, most of whom still came up to about Lily's shoulder. He was skinny, and he wore his almost-blond hair short but not weirdly shaved anywhere, and he was currently grinning at a couple of his buddies, brown eyes shining from behind a pair of wire-rim glasses.

Yikes, Lily thought, we elected somebody who wears glasses?

That made her a little nervous, actually. If he wore glasses and he was still popular enough to get voted in, he must be pretty cool. Cool was never a word other kids used to describe Lily. She knew that. Working with Ian could be humiliating.

But Lily straightened her shoulders. I'm president now, she told herself. It's all about confidence.

Just then, Ian looked across the aisle and caught her eye. She gave him a quick wave. He grinned, and it wasn't an "oh, brother, I have to work with a dork" smile but one that said, "All right."

It was enough to inspire Lily to shoot her hand up when Ms. Ferringer said, "Nominations for secretary?"

"Suzy Wheeler," Lily said when Ms. Ferringer called on her. She could hear shy Suzy protesting as Lily rose to give her nominating speech, but Lily ignored her. Suzy was the neatest, most organized person on the planet, which was what Lily told her audience. When she was finished, Ashley's whole row stood up like one person and shouted, "Boo!"

Before Lily could even start to turn blotchy, Deputy Dog was on them, hauling the whole crowd of them out of their seats and up the aisle. When the vote was taken, there was barely anybody there to vote for their candidate, Chelsea. Suzy was elected by a landslide.

From there it was a piece of cake getting Ian's friend Lee Ohara elected treasurer and Zooey elected historian. Kresha gave an adorable speech about Zooey's experience with scrapbooking. Lily was convinced most people voted for Zooey because they thought Kresha's accent was cute. By the time the assembly was over, none of Ashley's crowd had been elected to office, and three of the five Girlz had.

It was the two who hadn't - Kresha and Reni - who made Lily play down her victory as they all headed off for their second-period classes. Reni and Kresha seemed happy for them, but it struck Lily that this was one of the few times they wouldn't all be doing something together.

Lily changed the subject to what they were all going to do at their Girlz Only Club meeting at Zooey's after school. She was sure that made Kresha's smile a little wider and Reni's dimples a little deeper.

By the time she got home that day, however, Lily was about to pop to really share the news in style with somebody. Mom and Dad, she knew, were going to be so proud. And besides, with her older brother Art always winning at band contests and her little brother Joe hauling home trophies for every sport in life, it was nice to be a winner herself for a change.

She was a little disappointed when she first got home that Dad wasn't available. The Robbins family was adding on to the house - in preparation for a new kid they were hoping to adopt - and Dad was tied up in his study with a tattooed construction worker, poring over blueprints.

Mom didn't get home until almost 5:30, and by then Lily was ready to explode. She met Mom at the door from the garage, and said, "Guess what!"

"You got through the entire afternoon without getting into a fight with either of your brothers," Mom said. Her mouth twitched the way it did when she was teasing.

"No!" Lily said. "I mean - I did - but that's not my news."

"That's enough news for me," Mom said. "I may go into shock." She put two bags of groceries on the kitchen counter.

Continues...